Ethereum's "Fusaka" Upgrade: Another Empty Promise?
So, Ethereum's doing the "Fusaka" thing on December 3rd, 2025. Another hard fork. Another set of promises about scalability and lower fees. We've heard it all before, right? They’re saying it’ll help Layer 2 networks, lower costs, and let Ethereum handle, like, a bajillion transactions per second. Color me skeptical.

PeerDAS: Shuffling Deck Chairs on the Titanic?
PeerDAS is the big selling point here. The idea is validators only have to sample bits of data instead of downloading the whole damn thing. They compare it to checking random pages in a library instead of reading the whole book. Okay, fine, that sounds good. But let's be real, are we just shuffling the deck chairs on the Titanic here? Will it actually make a difference for the average user who's sick of paying insane gas fees? I doubt it.
The Patchwork Approach: A Foundation of Wet Sand?
They keep talking about how this upgrade builds on the last one, and the one before that. "Dencun introduced blobs," they say. "Fusaka makes it even better!" It's like they're trying to build a goddamn skyscraper on a foundation of wet sand. Each upgrade is just a patch on a patch, trying to fix problems created by the last patch. At what point do we just admit the whole damn thing needs a rewrite?
Gas Limit Increase: Too Little, Too Late?
And don't even get me started on the block gas limit increase. Oh, now they're letting more transactions through? Now they’re boosting from 36 million to 60 million gas units? After years of choking the network and making everything cost an arm and a leg? Give me a break. It's too little, too late. It's like giving someone a glass of water after they've been stranded in the desert for a week.
Technobabble and Unnecessary Additions
Offcourse, they throw in some "EVM improvements" and "new features" to make it sound extra fancy. Something about "cleaner programming structures" and "efficient cryptographic operations." Who the hell understands any of that crap? It's all just technobabble to distract you from the fact that, at its core, Ethereum is still a slow, expensive, and overly complicated mess.
Face ID for Crypto: A Step Too Far?
But wait, there's more! They're adding support for secp256r1, which means you might be able to use your iPhone's Face ID for crypto stuff. Great, just what we need – more ways to tie our digital lives to Apple's walled garden.
Staying Relevant: The Real Motivation?
The real reason for all this, of course, is to keep Ethereum relevant in the face of competition. Solana, Avalanche, and all those other "Ethereum killers" are nipping at its heels, promising faster speeds and lower fees. Fusaka is just another attempt to stay in the game, to convince institutions that Ethereum is still a viable platform for the future of finance. According to Fusaka rollout kicks off Ethereum’s new twice-a-year hard-fork schedule, this upgrade also marks the beginning of a new twice-a-year hard-fork schedule for Ethereum.
Unrealistic Promises and Market Manipulation?
They’re saying Layer 2 networks will have 3.5x more space to post transaction data. Big whoop. They’re saying costs will drop 40-60%. We’ll see it when we believe it. They're saying Ethereum could theoretically exceed Visa's transaction processing capacity. Yeah, and I'm saying I'm going to win the lottery tomorrow.
And the "Blob Fee Reserve Mechanism"? Please. It’s supposed to smooth out price volatility, but honestly, it sounds like another way for them to manipulate the market and screw over the little guy.
Cynicism or Realism?
Then again, maybe I'm just too cynical. Maybe this Fusaka upgrade will actually solve some of Ethereum's problems and make it a better platform for everyone. Maybe pigs will fly, too.
